Business Information by Gladys Edmunds
|At age 15 Gladys developed a travel service that would prosper for more than 30 years. She is a national award winning entrepreneur, keynote speaker, author and columnist. Visit her at www.gladysedmunds.com|
Compliments Are Great Gifts, So Be Sure To Accept Them
Why is it folks have such a difficult time accepting a compliment? Over the past few weeks I have given the gift of compliment to several entrepreneurs. In each case that gift was ignored or rejected.
I didn’t notice this until recently when Anna, a high school friend that I had not seen in years and I met for breakfast.
I arrived at the diner excited to reminisce over years gone by. Before I could say a word she said, “You look great.” I thanked her and told her that she too looked terrific.
She quickly responded with, “Girl get real, I’m 25 pounds over weight, I’ve got acid reflux, my kids turned out to be bums, and I’m a step away from Depends.”
The truth was, she looked pretty good to me. Perhaps I should say that was my truth, not hers.
Throughout our time together, when I gave her a compliment she would toss it back with a put down of herself. It was disappointing to me.
It came as no surprise to me when she said that she had been unsuccessful with three business ventures and two jobs.
Shortly after that lunch I stopped by a floral shop owned by a guy who had provided the table floral arrangement for a luncheon that I had attended.
I introduced myself, told him that I was in his neighborhood and recalled seeing his card on the tables and I just stopped by to let him know how beautiful the arrangements were. I could hardly get my words out before he quickly added that the sponsors of the luncheon had been awful to deal with and the project had not been an enjoyable one. He dismissed my compliment that could have been the turning point in how he felt about the project.
And finally, while shopping at one of my favorite grocery stores I commended the owner on how helpful her employees are. She responded with, “That’s what they get paid for.”
What happened to a simple “thank you,” after a compliment? Compliments are a two-way street. They are gifts for both the giver and the receiver. We give compliments as an expression of appreciation. It’s another way of saying thank you for being who you are; for making life enjoyable or easy or just plain livable. Expressing ones appreciation is self-empowering. It implies that one knows and acknowledges appreciation when he/she sees it.
A compliment is a gift; it says that you are valued. When a compliment is rejected it is the same as throwing the gift at the giver. If you constantly reject compliments in time they will stop coming your way.
Entrepreneurs need all the compliments we can get. Owning and running a business is not easy. Many days I have found the strength and energy to push through an otherwise bad day on the wave of having received a compliment from someone.
I set out each day to do something good for someone. Most days that something is an expression of appreciation in the form of a compliment. It is interesting the number of people who pass off a compliment with, “oh it’s nothing.”
Showing appreciation by complimenting is something of importance to both the giver and the receiver. I save all of my written letters and e-mails of appreciation and write down appreciative things that people say to me from day to day. These written reminders of appreciation are the prefer pick-me-up on a bad day.
And there is not an entrepreneur alive who can’t use a word of appreciation when he’s having a bad day. Sometimes when I’m having a tough day just giving someone a compliment and seeing his or her smile lightens my day.
The fall weather has arrived and we are headed into the full swing of the holiday season. For many of us life will get pretty hectic and a compliment or two can be just the thing we need to maintain a good mood, regardless to whether we are the giver or the receiver.
So the next time someone compliments you, learn to accept it and bask in it for a while. And show your appreciation by complimenting others for what they mean to you and notice how good it can make you feel.
Read other business articles by Gladys Edmunds